A Gift Be What Make It In The Florida Keys
by Tommy Kirchhoff

Awoke to the sound of a hungry stray cat, Nick rubbed at his eyes, and his beard, and his fat. Seemed tough for this tan island man to believe that a year quickly passed—was again Christmas Eve.

Hungover a little, he smiled at the day, and the charm of this season that keeps work at bay. Nick chuckled a little at his job and perhaps a guff for the boss and the clogging grease traps. He gave a "Ho Ho," not for lack of words— the sea air was warm, and the tourists in herds. "Forsooth a fine day, without gust or gale," said Nick as he set up his weekly yard sale.

"There is none so clever a merchant as I," though Nick had no cash, as for change he was dry. Nick sat back, a king, in a torn captain's chair, his driveway a kingdom of common and rare... His conscience, as hangovers often do reap, did dwindle and tire, and Nick fell asleep.

Thus entered a story (within what I tell) beginning with frames of a cold Christmas Hell. With diving so dark, and coral quite dead, then visions of sugar cane burned in this head. Next ringing this dream, this dream ringed a bell— was work that was calling, that ring he could tell. A fine gift was wrapped, and that couldn't suck; but opened Nick found a Hess Emergency truck.

Then darkness was lifted and out came the sun; the stolen outboard returned, and the damn thing did run! T'was Christmas and marked by a keg full of beer. Hey, there's Martha Stewart! How'd she get in here? The phone was still ringing, Nick scared of its bid; the boss said, "Good day lad, I'll raise you two quid." And under the mistletoe sprig, caught in angst, Martha Stewart puckered up, offered Nick, "Um no thanks."

At the sound of a car, Nick awoke from his wish. Wide eyed and intrigued, he cried out loud, "Odds fish!" At the sight of a man, he gained poise with a shake. "What interests thee, patron, yes what will thee take?"

"I'll give you three pence, smile I at that number, for you swooned Martha Stewart while lying in slumber."

"I'll take it," said Nick without showing the pain; "returneth manana, I'll do it again."