It is winter. Miles lives in Aspen. He's a ski bum, although he could give at least two or three euphemisms in lieu of that title.
Man (that's his real name) lives in Telluride. He's a ski bum, and he's happy to admit it.
Miles is driving his "friend's" BMW around Aspen, making random phone calls on the cellular. Man is leaning against a pay phone in Telluride, just watching the world go by.
Because neither of them have anything better to do, the pay phone rings; although it seems they are communicating, they're not. It goes something like this...
MAN: Hello?
MILES: Hi there. How's your bidet?
MAN: Warm and sunny. How's your's?
MILES: Misty - I think the pressure's dropping.
MAN: Watcha doin'?
MILES: Going for a pedicure. It's awful.
MAN: My dog hates the vet, too.
MILES: (confused) Oh. What are you doing?
MAN: I just got out of the bumps.
MILES: Me too. My nose won't stop bleeding.
MAN: Did you land on your face?
MILES: No. I couldn't get to sleep for days. I did a double-gram.
MAN: Is that like a daffy?
MILES: No. It's like that when you see stars.
MAN: Tell me about it. Last summer I fell off a 5-10.
MILES: Was she good?
MAN: Pretty flat. Trying to hang on was like couch surfing.
MILES: Is that dangerous?
MAN: If when you fall, you miss the couch and land on the floor.
MILES: Sports are rough. My back is still killing me from standing through an entire polo game. I'm going for a colonic tomorrow. Have you had one?
MAN: No. What do they taste like?
MILES: Ha! That's good.
MAN: Huh. I'll have to try one.
MILES: Have you taken any nice trips lately?
MAN: Whoa! Golden Sunshine!
MILES: Moab, huh?
MAN: No - I couldn't even leave the apartment.
MILES: (tragically confused) Really...
MAN: You like mushrooms?
MILES: Oh yeah. We make this Shitake Saute that's just scrumptious.
MAN: Really? Is that like tea? ( now really relating, and thinking his new friend is in Telluride) Had any good Free Box finds?
MILES: Well, you always end up buying dinner and paying for a movie.
MAN: Huh?
MILES: Nothing's really free.
MAN: Oh, you mean you have to give a little to take a little.
MILES: No, you have to spend a lot, and then usually you get none.
MAN: You're really weird - click (hangs up)
MILES: What a snob.